Myth‑busting facts
I know how much you love your baby. I also know how overwhelming it can feel when you’re sleep deprived, you’re doing your absolute best, you’re at capacity, and literally everyone - from friends to strangers online seems to have the answers for how to do this “right.”
Some information can be wonderful.
Some of it… not so much.
The tricky part? A lot of what’s shared is built on old outdated traditions, clever marketing, or personal anecdotes - not from evidence‑based research that’s been tested, peer‑reviewed, and proven to keep babies safe and families thriving.
You deserve guidance that’s grounded in truth and backed by science. Not because you need to follow every rule in a book, but because there are far too many unqualified “baby whisperers” making promises without the credentials or evidence to back them up.
I want you to feel confident, calm, and deeply connected to your baby. Not doubting yourself because of a random podcast episode or a slick social media post that makes you question your natural instincts to respond to your baby, or to expect too much of them.
That’s what this letter is for: to put some of the most common myths side‑by‑side with the facts, so you can make decisions that feel right for your baby, your family, and your instincts.
How to Spot Advice You Can Trust
When you’re running on very little sleep, use this quick filter:
Green flags — worth your attention:
✅ Backed by recognised health bodies (WHO, Red Nose Australia, Academy of Breastfeeding Medicine)
✅ Linked to peer‑reviewed research
✅ Allows for baby‑by‑baby differences
✅ No sales pitch
✅ From someone with a regulated health qualification (nursing, midwifery, IBCLC, psychology) and accountable to a professional code of ethics
Red flags — be cautious:
🚩 Ignores baby’s cues and encourages strict timeframes
🚩 Unregulated or non‑evidence‑based qualifications
🚩 Dismisses established safety guidelines
🚩 Pushes a product or paid program
Myth vs Fact — The Early Months
Myth 1: “Your newborn needs a strict feeding and sleep schedule.”
Fact: Babies thrive on responsive care — feeding and comforting to their cues, not the clock. Strict schedules can lower milk supply and increase unsettled behaviour. Healthy newborns may sleep 9–20 hours in 24, depending on feeding needs and co‑regulation (Galland et al., 2012; Douglas, 2024).
Myth 2: “Exclusively pumping early on is just as good as breastfeeding at the breast.”
Fact: Pumping can be essential in some situations, but exclusive pumping in the early weeks may make supply harder to establish, reduce skin‑to‑skin moments, and increase bottle preference. Direct breastfeeding fine‑tunes supply and offers immune benefits unique to the breast (WHO, 2023; ABM, 2022).
Myth 3: “Keep your baby swaddled for months so they sleep longer.”
Fact: Swaddling can soothe newborns, but stop once your baby shows signs of rolling — often by 3–4 months — to prevent suffocation and overheating. Extended tight swaddling may also affect motor skill development (Red Nose Australia, 2023).
Myth 4: “Ignore your baby’s cries so they learn to self‑soothe.”
Fact: Crying is communication. Ignoring distress can raise stress hormones and affect attachment. Responding warmly supports emotional regulation and secure bonding (Douglas, 2024; AAIMH, 2021).
Myth 5: “Babies should sleep through the night by a certain age.”
Fact: Waking overnight is biologically normal in the first year. It supports feeding, breathing regulation, and helps protect against SIDS. Longer stretches happen gradually as the brain matures (Douglas, 2024; Ball et al., 2018).
Myth 6: “If your baby sleeps on you, you’re creating bad habits.”
Fact: Contact sleep is normal for human infants. It can reduce crying, regulate heart rate and temperature, and increase oxytocin for both of you. Independence emerges naturally with growth (Douglas, 2024).
Myth 7: “Overheating isn’t a concern if your baby sleeps better.”
Fact: Overheating is a known, preventable SIDS risk. Dress your baby in light layers for the room temperature and avoid loose blankets or head coverings (Red Nose Australia, 2023).
Myth 8: “Starting solids early will help your baby sleep through.”
Fact: There’s no proven sleep benefit to starting solids before six months. Breastmilk or formula provides complete nutrition for the first half‑year while your baby’s gut and oral skills develop (NHMRC, 2021; WHO, 2023).
The Hidden Cost of Rigid Routines
Any advice that asks you to override your baby’s cues can slowly erode your confidence and connection.
For you, that might mean more stress, second‑guessing, and tension around feeding and settling.
For your baby, delayed responses may prolong distress, raise cortisol levels, and reduce the rich back‑and‑forth that builds secure attachment.
Reminder: Your baby doesn’t need perfect parenting.
They need you. Your warm, responsive care, your arms, your voice.
They need you to adapt. To listen to them with curiosity. To attune to them. To let go of expectations and tune in.
You are their safe place. Trust yourself.
You are everything your baby needs.
With love,
Arnikka
arnikka@sucklebubs.com.au
References
Academy of Breastfeeding Medicine. (2022). ABM clinical protocol #3: Hospital guidelines for the use of supplementary feedings in the healthy term breastfed neonate, revised 2017. Breastfeeding Medicine, 13(5), 307–314.
Australian Association for Infant Mental Health. (2021). Responsive parenting guidelines.
Ball, H. L., et al. (2018). Infant sleep development: Location, feeding and parental soothing. Early Human Development, 117, 48–54.
Douglas, P. (2024). Crying babies: How the brain works. NDC Institute.
Galland, B. C., et al. (2012). Normal sleep patterns in infants and children: A systematic review of observational studies. Sleep Medicine Reviews, 16(3), 213–222.
NHMRC. (2021). Infant feeding guidelines.
Red Nose Australia. (2023). Safe sleep recommendations.
World Health Organization. (2023). Infant and young child feeding.
